Barb Caffrey's Blog

Writing the Elfyverse . . . and beyond

Thoughts about Transgender Bathroom Rights, and Newest Guest Blog

with 12 comments

Folks, some days I just get so frustrated, I want to scream.

Why? Well, today’s news is that the Trump Administration apparently wants to rescind the Obama Administration directive regarding transgender students and bathrooms. The Obama directive more or less said that transgender students should be able to use the bathroom that suits their own, internalized gender; the Trump directive, which appears to be imminent, would rescind this directive and make trans students use the bathroom their outward gender would dictate instead.

This is incredibly annoying in many ways.

First, a young person who already identifies as being in the wrong body for their psyche is not looking to “convert” anyone. They just want to use a bathroom that makes sense to them.

Second, a young person who feels like he or she is in the wrong body already needs all the help he or she can get to figure out himself/herself. Being able to use the restroom that he or she identifies with is an easy thing to do to help, and preventing that person from using that same restroom just helps isolate that person even further.

So how does rescinding the Obama directive help anything?

The only point the people on the right who are in favor of rescinding Obama’s directive (which, fortunately, are not that many) have seemed to say is, “Well, this way, boys can’t use female restrooms by pretending to be girls!”

My answer? If these overly-concerned people really believe young men, already an angst-filled subset of the population, are going to suddenly identify as female to use female bathrooms, that is just silly.

(A young man who does that deserves what he gets, in other words.)

Anyway, I’m a straight woman. I’ve never dated a woman, never kissed one either, and never plan to do so — I am attracted to men. But that does not mean I don’t understand how stupid this is.

So, compared to that, my latest guest blog, about my route to publication, seems very small. But as I’m the writer of a book about two troubled souls who both end up transgender (and stay very much in love with each other), CHANGING FACES, I figured I’d let you know what I think.

And even though it is a very small thing in context, do, please, take a look at my newest guest blog. I think you’ll enjoy it.

Who knows? Maybe it’ll remind you that trans people are just like anyone else.

Because they are.

12 Responses

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  1. Oh good grief! I swear… can’t people just leave it alone? I’ve never been trans but I feel empathy towards them. Why? Because I’m human. I’ll be ready for online attacks by idiots now. *puts on steel helmet*

    N. N. Light

    February 22, 2017 at 4:17 pm

  2. If some folk are that concerned then they should keep a look out for bushes or carry a small shovel (Just like the good ol’ days)

    Woebegone but Hopeful

    February 22, 2017 at 4:51 pm

    • Agreed. 😉

      Barb Caffrey

      February 22, 2017 at 5:37 pm

      • Years back in my career in the UK Civil Service, we actually found some old 19th century instructions advising office staff of the garden of the building being ‘available for the purposes of nature’ and then matters concerning discretion. 🙂

        Woebegone but Hopeful

        February 23, 2017 at 3:08 am

      • 😀 The more things change, the more they stay the same? 😉

        Barb Caffrey

        February 26, 2017 at 2:35 pm

      • Humanity seems to have that knack doesn’t it?

        Woebegone but Hopeful

        February 26, 2017 at 5:33 pm

      • Yes, it does. 🙂

        Barb Caffrey

        February 26, 2017 at 5:41 pm

  3. This is something that Obama never should have had the Feds step into. It’s not a Federal issue.


    February 23, 2017 at 2:03 pm

    • Ultimately, I’d agree, Kamas. As a practical matter, it probably shouldn’t have been. But there are some states out there that are way, way behind the times on this, and those states are probably why he did make it a federal order.

      Personally, I do remember how awful it was to dress in the locker room. I developed late, and got teased a lot, and was taller than average and loved sports but was clumsy…

      Anyway, I think that’s why I have sympathy for those who don’t fit easily into society’s categories. Adolescence was so damned hard for me; I can’t imagine what it must be like for a trans youth. And I just don’t want the LGBTQ kids out there to feel like no one understands or cares; if nothing else, let these poor kids use the faculty restroom, and be left in peace to figure themselves out. (That’s not an ideal situation either, but it’s a whole lot better than having a trans boy — born female, has not had surgery yet, but is taking testosterone and is growing a beard — in the female bathroom and locker room because “she” was born female but is now, in actuality, male.

      Barb Caffrey

      February 26, 2017 at 2:35 pm

  4. All states should either provide unisex bathrooms, or allow for transgender individuals to use the gender bathroom that they identify with. Forcing the transgender community to use a gendered bathroom according to their biological sex puts the individual in danger, creates an atmosphere of discomfort for both the individual and the people around them, and also fuels prejudice. According to a survey conducted by the National Center for Transgender Equality reported that almost 60 percent of Transgender Americans have avoided using public restrooms for fear of confrontation. 12 percent of transgender Americans were verbally harassed in public restrooms within the previous year, 1 percent were physically attacked and 1 percent were sexually assaulted. 9 percent reported being denied access to a bathroom. Making gender-neutral bathrooms for public places and businesses would be a great solution that states should consider. Some companies, such as starbucks, have already adopted the gender-neutral bathrooms and have had success with them thus far.


    April 28, 2017 at 4:19 pm

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