Sunday Mourning

Folks, we’ve had a couple of tragedies in Wisconsin in recent weeks that have deeply affected me. Because of that, and because it’s Sunday, I wanted to discuss them in the hopes that someone out there has some ideas as to comfort those who remain.

First, a young couple from Racine County, Gina and Emerson Weingart, died at Gina’s workplace, the Sports Page Barr in Elkhorn. They were killed on February 1, 2024, just after midnight. Gina worked for Wisconsin Vision during the day and bartended at night; her husband was a meat manager at a grocery store in Mukwanago. He was there to protect her…and perhaps he did, as he died along with her.

The suspect in the shooting is a fifty-seven-year-old convicted felon. (As is my wont, I am not going to name this man. He’s gotten enough publicity already.) He shouldn’t have had a gun. He did. He shot them to death. And he ran…but was caught.

This individual now has pled not guilty to this crime, but his reasoning is ridiculous. According to the Milwaukee Journal-Sentinel (behind a paywall so I can’t link to it), this man said he only shot Gina Weingart when she tried to take the gun away from him. He said, again according to the Journal-Sentinel, that he took the money out of the cash register and only then shot Emerson Weingart. He clumsily tried to dispose of the weapon, and went straight home…and the police found him, very quickly.

I realize we’re all presumed innocent until proven guilty. But this man’s explanation of why he killed two young lovers makes no sense.

Mr. and Mrs. Weingart married in June of 2023. It sounds like, to me at least, that they waited until Covid died down so they could celebrate their wedding with their families.

So. They were newlyweds. Deeply in love. Working hard, as people do when they’re able. She had two jobs. He had one that was tough, as being a meat manager is no sinecure. Their whole lives were in front of them.

This suspect, who I remind you all was a convicted felon, snuffed out their lives for no reason at all.

In case anyone out there is thinking, “Well, a good man with a gun could’ve killed that guy,” please spare me. We have too many guns in this country already if a convicted felon can get one and do this, all right? Besides, my heart is sore for these people and their loved ones. They should both be alive today, enjoying themselves, and appreciating their life together. That they’re not is a crime whether this guy gets convicted or not.

If you want to help with final expenses for the Weingarts, there is a GoFundMe set up. They have raised $15K. Now, that probably did cover most of the expenses…but considering how people have donated hundreds of thousands of dollars to people who mostly don’t need it in the past (such as Mary Lou Retton, or even though I approved of it, Damar Hamlin after his near-death experience on the football field), I’d like to see more help for this couple if at all possible.

Now to the second tragedy. There was an awful crash in Clark County (rural Wisconsin) between a semi truck and a bus. Nine people died. One person, a two-year-old child, lived. We don’t know the names of everyone yet, but apparently seven of them were from a small town, Burke’s Garden, in Virginia. They were Amish. There is also a GoFundMe set up for these victims, which makes sense when you consider that the Amish do not in general buy life insurance nor do they have much in the way of health insurance either.

Both of these tragedies have deeply upset me. First, the young couple…my goodness, why did this even happen? Second, the Amish minding their own business on the bus…this particular place in Clark County, apparently, is known for being a deceptive intersection where many accidents happen (this according to a few news reports I’ve seen on television and heard on the radio). The semi was on one road; the bus was on another, it intersected, they hit each other, and all but one person died. (One of the folks that died on the bus was a six-month-old child.) As I said before, a two-year-old lived; his grandparents found a way to get to him (as they are Amish, it sounds like, as well) in order to take care of him as every single last other member of his family along for that trip died.

The Amish certainly believe in the Higher Power, known as male and monotheistic, and believe everything happens for a reason. Yet it seems utterly absurd to believe that a two-year-old was supposed to be left alone after the rest of his immediate family has died. How is that cosmic justice?

Both of the Weingarts believed in God, too. Gina was raised Catholic. Her husband was a member of an evangelical Lutheran church. (Both of them had a joint obituary, seen here.) They were doing the right things in the best of ways, it sounds like; they were considerate people, caring people, and honest people. They were the type of folks who would give you the shirts off their backs if you needed it…and their lives were snuffed out by someone who seems completely unworthy of the sobriquet “human being.”

Too many people forget those who’ve died, who’ve predeceased them, especially when they die by accident (as in the Clark County traffic accident) or have died on the job (as happened to Gina Weingart and her husband, Emerson Weingart). I refuse to be among those who have forgotten, already, the victims of these senseless tragedies.

I don’t know why terrible things happen. I wish I did.

All I do know is that I mourn for them all, but most especially Gina and Emerson Weingart. They should be alive today, and that they aren’t sickens me.

Easter Week Thoughts: Carrying Each Other’s Burdens

Is it possible for human beings to comprehend that other people have burdens, too?

Sure, we know our own burdens — the problems we carry mile after mile, day after day. They’ve become so much a part of us, it goes without saying…they’re just there, and we keep on shouldering them because we know no other way.

But we don’t always know what burdens the other person is carrying, just as the other person doesn’t know our burdens.

Yes, there’s a way around this problem. You can ask what’s going on. Maybe you can help shoulder the load for a while, if the other person allows it…if the other person lets you reach inside, so you can see them in the same way you see yourself.

Because it’s Easter Week, I’ve been thinking a lot about this. I know all sorts of people, and every one of them has problems. Some are more profound than others; some are of more immediate concern than others, too. But every single last one of us has problems.

Buddha recognized that, in his time. So did Jesus Christ. So did other notable religious figures…it’s one of those universal truths that everyone respects, but no one knows how to solve. (Though Buddha’s dispassionate look at suffering is certainly worth a try, to be sure.)

Is it possible for us to carry each other’s burdens? Can pain be halved, if someone else knows of it and cares about you and wants to relieve your burden(s)?

I hope so. I believe so. But I don’t know for certain.

What I do know, for certain, is that if you don’t talk about what’s bothering you — or worse, you can’t talk about what’s bothering you — for most of us, that pressure builds and builds like heating food inside a pressure cooker. Eventually, as in the pressure cooker, that heat is going to escape…and it might escape in all directions.

That’s why discussing your problems, discussing your pain, discussing your burdens, can give comfort and peace even if there’s no ready solution for any of them.

Try not to be upset if you need to unburden yourself. Why?

Two examples:

• Mother Teresa talked of how depression could overcome her, in her diaries. (In her case, she was definitely unburdening herself to the Higher Power.) She gained comfort and clarity from this, and was able to go back to her work with the poor of Calcutta with a lighter heart.
• And Jesus Christ, the night before he was taken to be crucified, seems in retrospect to have wanted his friends to know he was aware of his fate and accepted it. (If that doesn’t show just how much comfort can be gained by discussion, I don’t know what will.)

Maybe this is why unburdening yourself to a friend tends to help, even if your friend cannot solve your problem(s) for you. By doing so, you remind yourself that you’re not alone, and that someone else cares about you and the burdens you carry.

That, to my mind, is an important thing to keep in mind. Especially during Easter Week.